


Nepeta Hotdogs

by The_Pen_Dragon



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Random Junk, absolute nonsense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-21
Updated: 2015-03-21
Packaged: 2018-03-18 21:32:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3584832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Pen_Dragon/pseuds/The_Pen_Dragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hullo yes I am still here! I'm working on a new chapter for This is War, but in the mean time have some nonsense junk I wrote awhile back. It makes me laugh when I read it, and is clearly not serious. Just absolute nonsense I wrote when I was bored one day.</p><p>Also rated teen because people die but in an absolutely ridiculous way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nepeta Hotdogs

Nepeta had always loved hotdogs, but today she decided to eat one in a different way.

"Equihiss! Watch me eat this here meat tube with my face!" She exclaimed violently, smashing her face into the hotdog.

"NEPETA NO! YOU'LL DIE!" Equius yelled, smashing the table to bits and chucking his TV out the window. 

Nepeta didn't listen though, she used her cat like teeth to tear off a tiny bit off the hotdog and swallow it whole. Then she farted on the rest of the hotdog and ate it with her ears, digesting it quickly in her brain acid. 

Suddenly a TV crew came in and wheeled her away for that miraculous trick. They interviewed her and gave her a show, "Cat Fart Hotdog Eat Brain Acid Tofu Killer". It was hard to say so it was shortened to CFHEBATK or KFC for shorter shortening of the shortening.

Nepeta ate many hotdogs with her brain and licked many car windows on her way to fame. Equius watched it all on his TV, which had spontaneously reappeared in his house. He cried acid that melted his furniture and refused to go to the bathroom. He rolled on the floor like a dying cow about to give birth, and he also wet himself numerous times.

Nepeta became sad that she had abandoned equius, so she killed everyone with brain acid hot dog juice and ran home, leaping over whole cities. She burst in and had sloppy makeouts immediately.

"Nepeta!" Equius screeched like a banshee, "let's maybe get married!"

"I nefur thought you'd ask!" She replied. Then she threw up an entire bicycle and deemed it worthy.


End file.
